Summer Lovin'

I received a lot of comments from many different people that my blogs have not been up to snuff. Well, that is putting it politely. Most have been written when I was distracted to say the least. But summer seems to be like that every year-lots of promises to do this and that and before I know it, it is September. As much as I have been disappointed in my own writing, I am kind of honored that people can tell the difference!
So last night I got one of the magazines I subscribe to on how to be a good parent. I have always had faith in myself that my child won't grow-up to be the next Charles Manson, but any additional help was welcomed. After all, Asa never came with instructions. But now, 2 years after getting my first magazine, I want to know when parenting got so hard? I read two different magazines and each month I can be assured of a deadly disease of the month, activity ideas I can't afford, and lots of tips on getting my child to do exactly want I want, and if he doesn't do what I want, I am doing something wrong. Obviously the days of sending our kids out into the world with a wagon and a horse to play with are gone. Both are too dangerous for anyone under the age of 20. But I think we have forgotten that little kids are little kids regardless of what year it is. When I see Asa play with rocks and garbage, effectively ignoring every "educational toy" he has, I can see in my mind little boys, and girls, from decades before doing the same thing. And when my little angel turns to me and shouts NO!, I am pretty sure that other little communicators are doing the same thing around the world. Besides, the magazine is pretty two-faced in my opinion. One month I see an article encouraging no sugar drinks, and the next month there is a 10 page glossy for the newest juice, loaded with enough sugar to wire up a whole army of kids. Plus, most of my best parenting advice has come from other parents, and the internet can make up for whatever I may be missing.
So now that I have decided to NOT re-new my subscriptions, and am going to raise my child without the help of "experts", here is what you can expect from my child:
*He will be dirtier since I am not reading about the next superbug he could catch.
*He will be low on table silverware use. If he can't use a fork and spoon by the time he is 10, I will send him to a special class.
*He will get some sugar cereals because I did as a kid and somehow lived, but the new "low sugar" juices (with just enough sugar to take out one family instead of an army of kids) will still be watered down.
*No more craft ideas so he will have to make do with every item in the house for playtime-oh wait, he already does that. I guess it means no more eating crayons than.
*He will go to bed to late, dress in mis-matched clothes (no more glossy's for guidance), and go outside in the sun despite the warnings of skin cancer, ticks, bad people, mean kids, possibly deadly scratches, dogs, cats, and water dangers.
* He will continue to do things that amaze me only now I won't be so surprised (but still amazed) because I will have nothing to compare him too. (Except the neighbors dogs who listen as well as Asa. Poor neighbors.)
*I will still love him with all my heart, even though I don't have a magazine to tell me that I should. And I will still avoid beating him because I don't need to pay money to know that is wrong.

Just because I don't want the magazines that are out there though doesn't mean I don't have ideas of what I would like to see by way of information. Below are the articles I am looking for and if you see them, please hook me up.
"10 Ways To Convince Your Kid To Eat By What's On Sale, Not What Taste's Good"
"Daddy Disciplinarian:When To Listen And When To Ignore Him Eating Twinkies Right Before Dinner"
"You To Can Love Laundry:10 Simple Magic Spells To Make It Happen"
"Renewable, Cheap Energy-How To Hook Your Kid Up To Your Hot Water Heater"
"A Penny Saved Is A Penny Earned: How To Encourage The Cheap Labor In Your House Without Resorting To Violence and 'Leave It To Beaver' Scenarios"
"Whining: 10 Mental Exercises To Avoid Going Insane"
"Logic: Kids Have None So Fornicator Beware"
"The Black Hole: How Kids Take Every Last Dime Just By Eating and Pooping"
"The Grandma/ Grandpa Paradox: Why Cookies At Their House Are Edible, But Are Poisonous In Our House